http://www.twodaymag.com/ TwoDayMag full feed en nat@twodaymag.com Copyright 2012 2012-02-06T13:14:23+00:00 Live http://www.twodaymag.com/live/go-text-yourself#When:13:14:23Z Over a 90-minute time span two weekends ago, my father and I had a conversation via text messages that could have provided more dialogue, details and interaction in a three-minute phone call than the nine or so messages sent back and forth. But there we were, texting.On Friday, a friend sent me 10 text messages in 6.5 hours. I had responded to none of them as I was busy working. On my way to meet up with a friend after work, I called her, wanting to talk about the various items she sent me earlier in the day. While leaving her a voice mail, she sent a one-word text (“gym”) telling me where she was, and, I assume, why she did not answer.When a good friend and I met up for dinner with another close friend of ours who left home in the fall for an out-of-state job, much of the evening was spent having in-real-life conversations as faces were buried into phones replying to messages, keeping up with games or checking Twitter.The need to be connected actually is leaving us with disconnected relationships, whether it be a marriage, a budding romance, a friendship or family.Don’t believe me? When is the last time you sat in person with a friend without any interruptions? When is the last time you called a friend just to ask how they are?As if strengthening relationships isn’t difficult enough with technological disruptions, ending them via text messages seems just as easy as playing your next turn in Words with Friends.A Recombu.com survey last month revealed that one in 10 people are dumped via text. The United Kingdom-based site about mobile phones surveyed 2,000. People can’t even break up in person anymore.“Texting is such a part of how we communicate as a whole now that it is natural that this will be used for something [relationship related],” Recombu.com editor Hannah Bouckley said in an interview with the United Kingdom’s Daily Mail. We have such a sick addiction with wanting to always check Facebook, Twitter, text messages and e-mail that a new trend is attempting to reverse this sad, disconnected society.It’s called “phone stacking,” and it is exactly what it sounds like. The idea is that those around a dinner table or at an outing with a group of folks stack their phones, keeping the devices in sight but out of reach of those tempted to disconnect from reality to enter into their virtual world.If someone grabs their phone, they must pick up the restaurant tab.How pathetic are we that a game such as phone stacking must be implemented so that we can share an uninterrupted moment in person with people?Yet, it seems like such a necessary step. I often force friends to relinquish their phones during dinner or at some other outing. Nothing aggravates me more than trying to have a conversation or enjoy something with others who are busy replying to text messages or tweets.Sadly, most folks scoff at my requests or begrudgingly place their phone into a pocket, only to sneak glances as though I’m not looking.Technology is a double-edged sword. On one hand, technology has allowed us to interact with friends like never before — through photos, online games, Facebook posts, Foursquare check-ins and more.Without technology, I likely would not have many of the friends I do now. Heck, I met my two best friends thanks to the Internet.But as humans who depend on others to survive, we have failed to appropriately incorporate technology with our need for interpersonal communications. In other words, we’d sooner text a friend than call, share a photo of our dinner than eat together and scour photo uploads instead of meeting in person.Some folks have actually told me they enjoy texting over phone calls! A text offers nothing but cold text, while a phone call offers us a chance to hear the tone of our friend’s voice and engage in ways where we learn exactly what makes each other tick. Of course, not even a phone call can substitute for in-real-life time with people.There are ways to successfully incorporate technology within our relationships, but we need to focus more on our human instinct than a text message or tweet.******************************twoday magazine wants to know: Do you find yoruself relying more and more on technology to communicate? How has it affected your relationships? Facebook us your thoughts.Keep up with twodaymag’s weekly contributor, Bobby Cherry, at GoBobbo.com. Tweet him at @Gobobbo. Bobby's World, Sex and Self Awareness, homepage carousel, section landing page carousels 2012-02-06T13:14:23+00:00 Live http://www.twodaymag.com/live/the-komen-katastrophe#When:15:42:27Z Everyone is still buzzing about the Susan G. Komen Foundation's decision to revoke breast cancer screening grants it had promised Planned Parenthood. Then we buzzed more as we watched Komen spokespeople fumble through official statements about why they did it. We all sighed and shook our heads in disbelief when we eventually learned that they would reinstate the grants.  What a public relations nightmare.I stayed up hours past my bedtime the day the news broke to watch an absolute social media war wage on both the Komen and Planned Parenthood Facebook pages.  Pro-life activists claimed victory over pro-choice activists.  Pro-choice activists accused pro-lifers of only caring about life long enough to make sure a person is born.I'm glad Komen reinstated the grants. But the way this whole predicament developed and was eventually resolved is a mess.  Regardless of where a person stood on this issue, everyone can agree that the whole situation created a lot of ugliness and hatred on both sides.  And it completely dominated everyone's attention.Planned Parenthood most definitely got the good end of the deal.  Not only did they have their grant reinstated, they also seemed to be the big winner in the media and in the minds of the public, who donated something in the neighborhood of $3 million to the organization in just three days. This is according to estimates from Planned Parenthood's president.Komen, on the other hand, alienated a lot of pro-choice supporters with their initial announcement about parting ways with Planned Parenthood. To make it worse, they then alienated their pro-life supporters after reinstating their partnership with Planned Parenthood.One decision made by a few people in a board room ended up dictating what a whole week's worth of news stories would be about.  What's even scarier is that Komen's decision was mainly a front page story because the policy effected two very high profile organizations.Try to think of all of the other things that happened this week.  Does anything else even ring a bell?CNN ran a story about a woman in Afghanistan who was beaten by her husband and mother-in-law and then eventually strangled to death. The reason? The woman had given birth to yet another girl, her third, and her husband was tired of waiting on a male heir.  Want to hear about another story?  Buried down in the depths of the Health page on MSNBC.com was a story about an FDA recall for one million defective packages of oral contraceptives manufactured by Pfizer.  Turns out that the pills could be switched around in the packaging, leading women to take the wrong pill on the wrong day, which of course could lead to an unintended pregnancy.The news about Komen and Planned Parenthood deserved attention and I am in no way minimizing the weightiness of the Komen/Planned Parenthood issue.  In fact, I am emotionally and politically invested in my support of Planned Parenthood and am very glad Planned Parenthood is getting some positive publicity as a result of all of this.But it is also important to point out to everyone that all day, every day, you can find stories about women fighting for fairness, just like you did this week when women with breast cancer were in the news. There are daily news stories about women who are beaten, killed, abused or even misled about the effectiveness of their birth control pills.  It is important to remember that if you helped fight the fight for women's rights this week, it is just as important to fight the fight everyday.**************************************twoday magazine wants to know: What stories moved you in the news this week? Share your links on our Facebook page! Sally Turkovich Wright lives in Pittsburgh with her husband, Jason and German Shepherd, Zeus.  By day she works as an eyewear stylist for an independent eye doctor.  By night, she writes a twice-weekly column for twoday magazine.  Catch up with her on twodaymag.com. Health and Wellness, Wellness Contributor: Sally Turkovich, Sex and Self Awareness, homepage carousel, section landing page carousels 2012-02-05T15:42:27+00:00 Play http://www.twodaymag.com/play/book-review-no-woman-diets-alone#When:20:12:53Z When I first read, No Woman Diets Alone, There’s Always a Man Behind Her Eating a Doughnut, by best-selling author Kristen Houghton, I wasn’t sure what I was in store for. I absolutely loved the title and was curious to see what was in store. And, I wasn’t disappointed! After I began reading (and laughing out loud, and nodding my head in agreement, and reciting parts out loud to friends who I knew would identify) I realize that Kristen Houghton truly knows how to bridge the gap between the sexes and make our differences seem more entertaining than nerve-wracking. Fresh. Funny. Honest. Relatable. These are just a few of the adjectives that I would use to describe Houghton’s collection of short stories about marriage and relationships. Houghton’s breezy conversational style of writing makes it easy to become absorbed in her world of men, women and the dynamics between us. From planning vacations together, to buying a home, Houghton finds the hilarity (and truth) embedded in the daily interactions between women and men. This is a book not to be missed! I chatted with Kristen Houghton recently about her latest e-book. We had a great conversation about the differences between men and women, about how to make a marriage last, and how to have fun with the love in your life. It truly seems as though the key to any happy, long-term relationship is to be able to have a sense of humor about it. Humor is something Houghton has in spades. Enjoy our interview and don’t forget to check out, No Woman Diets Alone, There’s Always a Man Behind Her Eating a Doughnut.twoday: This book is fantastic! What was your inspiration for writing it?Houghton: I love humor because it makes me feel good and I can find the humor in every situation. Little things that would happen either with me or with my husband, like when we bought out house, that was a true story that I just had to include into the book. All of the stories in the book are either real or based on real events that I pulled from life. I started working on the book a little bit at a time, and it just came about and it seemed as though the time was now to do it.twoday: How did you pick what stories that you picked into the book?Houghton: That’s actually a difficult decision, because you fall in love with all of them and it is a similar idea to the concept of giving birth. You want to see them all blossom. But some of the ones I had gotten really great response from friends, those are the ones I chose. The ones that people email me about, those are the articles that I realized people were relating to. That’s how I picked them for the most part.twoday: Do you think this book fills a certain void that you didn’t see out there on the bookshelves (or in this case, the virtual bookshelves)?Houghton: Yes I do believe that we need more books out there that celebrate the differences between men and women as well as point out the humorous parts of being in a relationship or marriage. These stories are something we can all relate to...and laugh about! twoday: One of my favorite short stories that you wrote about is entitled: “Hamburger vs Steak and We’re Not Talking About Food”. It is such a funny (and true!) take on how what men and women say to each other can be completely misconstrued and cause all kinds of unnecessary drama within the relationship. In this case, your husband stated that he thought one of your friends was “hot” which set off a host of other hilarious events. How do you feel about the (mis)communication between men and women?Houghton: What I loved about writing this book was trying to see these situations from a man’s vantage point and have fun with it. Yes, my husband thought my friend was attractive, but I took it in a very different way than in which he meant it! I think, no matter how long you are with someone, you are always hoping to turn their head in your direction. twoday: Are you planning on writing any other books on humor? This genre seems to fit you very well. Houghton: I love writing humorous books because there is a need out there for us all to laugh more. I love writing self-help books, like my previous book, And Then I’ll Be Happy: Stop Sabotaging Your Happiness and Put Your Own Life First! I also write horror stories, as well, which a lot of people don’t know about, so who knows what I will write next! I always seem to have a lot of projects going on at once, which I love!***************************And for your reading pleasure, dear readers, here is a small excerpt from one of my favorite short stories from No Woman Diets Alone, There's Always a Man Behind Her Eating a Doughnut.     The Simple (?!) Art of Planning a VacationMy husband holds the title for World‟s Greatest Procrastinator. It took him three months, no exaggeration, to switch internet servers. He'll tell me he needs an oil change in April and get around to doing it in August. That being said, you can imagine how much stress is involved getting him to help plan a vacation with me. Cleaning the teeth of a wide-awake, hungry bull alligator would be less stressful. So when I mentioned that Las Vegas would be a nice place for a vacation, I got what I expected. No comment and a sudden need on his part to take out the garbage which town law says shouldn’t be on the curb until after six P.M. “Why do you have to take it out now?” I ask. “It isn‟t even five yet.” “Honey! The neighbors already have theirs out. You don‟t want to be last, do you?” “In taking out garbage?! Yeah, last is okay with me on that one,” I say to the back of his head as he heads out the door. During dinner I tell him that I went into the website for the new “Wynn Las Vegas,” the brand-new mega-hotel built by Steve Wynn." “Wow, is it beautiful! And the prices are not bad at all! You really should see it!” No comment. He‟s concentrating on the green squash which he has never paid any attention to before. Actually he hates green squash. “Would you like to see it?” I persist. Big sigh. “Want some more squash?” I say sarcastically. “I know how much you love it.” Bigger sigh. Two days go by with my subtle hints becoming not-so-subtle as he finds “things” to occupy him while he procrastinates. It isn‟t until a dinner out with his best friend, who has just returned from Vegas, and is bragging about the fantastic time he and his fianceé had, that I see him get interested. Male ego thing, of course. The next day I see him clicking away on the laptop. “What are you doing?” He just smiles and beckons me over to see. I look over his shoulder and, wonder of wonders, he has the website for the Wynn Las Vegas on the screen! Impressed I throw my arms around him and give him a big hug. “So you‟ll help me plan it?” I say. “Oh yeah, I‟m really psyched, it is fantastic! But, honey, there‟s a lot more we can do than just be at the hotel, you know. Let me check out a few things for us to do.” “Really? Okay. You plan what you want and let me know. You‟re so good at this type of thing, sweetheart,” I purr in his ear, not at all ashamed to use the time honored promise of sex to get what I want. ************************************To get your copy of Kristen Houghton’s hilarious new e-book, No Woman Diets Alone, There’s Always a Man Behind Her Eating a Doughnut, CLICK HERE.And don’t forget to check out her best-selling book (one of my most favorites!) And Then I’ll Be Happy! Stop Sabotaging Your Happiness and Put Your Own Life First. (A MUST READ!)Follow Kristen on Twitter @kristenhoughton. Miss N's Required Reading, homepage carousel, section landing page carousels 2012-02-04T20:12:53+00:00 Blog http://www.twodaymag.com/blog/its-your-health-radio-interview-women-and-guns-an-unlikely-marriage#When:13:47:07Z CLICK HERE for the radio broadcast.Don’t forget to check out other fantastic interviews on It’s Your Health Radio! *********************************Follow Lisa Davis on Twitter @healthmediagal1 for updates on upcoming interviews.Follow Natalie Bencivenga on Twitter @nataliestweets to get tips about healthy living and relationships. Odd Relationships, Self Awareness, Site News 2012-02-03T13:47:07+00:00 Love http://www.twodaymag.com/love/how-to-repel-the-opposite-sex-just-in-time-for-valentines-day#When:13:39:17Z Valentine’s Day looms over the horizon like a behemoth; rearing its eight tentacled heads as it prepares for a charge, mowing over our convenience stores, card shops, coffee houses, and eventually, our psyches. How does one cope with its presence, especially if one is not exactly expecting to take part in the festivities?  Or, let’s say, if one is already so down in the dumps about his/her’s lack of romantic life, that the idea of a holiday specifically designed to celebrate it makes one want to hide inside a makeshift bed-fort living off of only extra crunchy peanut butter and skittles while watching reruns of Desperate Housewives to the point of insanity?Well, if that’s the case, you are in luck, buddy.  Because this article is for you.I think if there were ever a holiday that was created specifically to foster unrealistic expectations and massive amounts of disappointment, Valentine’s Day is it.  The most romantic day of the year!  It’s the one day when you and your loved one spend time with each other and go out to dinner and declare your feelings of passion and then he proposes and the next thing you know you are doing the naughty tango of non-committal love and within the year you have a baby on Valentine’s Day and name it Valentino because you wish to scar him for the rest of his life with the knowledge of the day in which he was conceived…and well, you get the picture.It’s a day full of fun, spontaneity, romance…unless of course, you’re working, or he’s working, or, god forbid one of you forgets or tells the other “it’s okay, you don’t have get me anything, we can just stay in that night” and they actually don’t get you anything or make dinner reservations; resulting in a fight so cataclysmic that it makes the U.N. propose sanctions on your house.   I personally think the whole thing was engineered by the chocolate companies. They ain’t stupid.  They know that when a person is experiencing heartache and disappointment, their new companion quickly becomes a three-tiered box of dark chocolate truffles.Regardless, if you want to really stick it to whoever deemed an infant in wings packing a crossbow as “romantic,” then I suggest this Valentine’s Day, you make it your mission to positively repel any one that goes your way.  Or, you know, you could read these and make yourself a list of what not to do so you won’t scare away a potential suitor; however, I won’t openly suggest that because, you know, I’m bitter.Well, the first thing you want to do to absolutely revolt someone (trust me, I’m an expert) is to make yourself as painfully and obnoxiously desperate as humanly possible.  Our first scenario involves a person asking you for your phone number.In addition to giving them your cell phone number, also be sure to give them your home phone number, a description of your carrier pigeon, a map with your address circled and highlighted, a list of the good qualities you bring into a relationship, a list of the bad qualities that you are willing to change in order to make yourself worthy of their love, and a planner with all of the days you have off of work circled with berry scented pink highlighter. Basically, act as though by them asking for your number, they are confirming the fact that you are indeed soulmates.  This will guarantee that will conveniently “lose” your number, and avoid you at any/all costs.  If this goes well, then mission accomplished.  You have officially repelled a potential suitor.  Ah, it’s nice to know that you’re doing this intentionally for once.  However, let’s say that they get beyond the fact that you own a carrier pigeon/are bat shit crazy and call you and ask you out on a date.  Well, you could ignore them, tell them straight up “no”, or pretend that they have the wrong number and you speak-o no English-o.  However, let’s say, that you forget yourself and agree to meet up with them.  Well, here’s my breakdown as to how to get out of this little pickle. Remember before, the obnoxiousness and the eagerness?  Well, for some reason, they actually found that endearing.  So we’re going to want to go with the “Sinead O’Connor” strategy.  I want you to be as dark, cynical, and unpleasant as possible.  Fish for compliments, but when they are delivered, disregard them and complain about the feature they just complimented.  If you can cry at will, now would be the time. Don’t be mean to them, I would never suggest that! Rather, convince them that you are more than slightly disturbed and would much more benefit from a long term observation at a mental health clinic rather than a second date at “this great new Italian place.”However, let’s say you’ve found yourself a masochist/one of those dreaded optimists that think that they can “fix you.”  All of the sudden, the two of you are dating.  Here are some long term strategies.  First of all, you should just tell them that you’re “not in the right head space” for a relationship. But let’s say that you are non-confrontational/are actually a little crazy, and simply can’t tell them directly that you never wanted to date them in the first place. Don’t worry, I can’t judge considering that I am, after all, the one writing this.  Okay!  Here’s what you are going to want to do.  In almost every relationship I’ve witnessed that has gone south, people do one of three things:  A.)  They rush into things way too quickly, saying the “I love you!” and “When we get married…” and “We will have the cutest babies!”  within mere weeks of dating, causing way too much pressure and stress that sometimes results in the other party becoming really freaked out and suddenly needing time to “discover themselves.”   B.) Some people appear to be indifferent about dating, don’t act like they are in a relationship, and refuse to “label” their relationship status, even when it’s clear that they are steadily seeing someone.  Commitment issues and the desire to be “non-conformist to society’s expectations about sex” strike again!  C.) I think the most prevalent issue is that one member of the love duo puts in no effort at all, causing the other member to overcompensate, and then resent you, and eventually leave your ass for someone who will actually give a damn.Well friends, there you have it.  My extraordinarily dysfunctional not-dating psychotic advice.  If you are not looking for love this Valentine’s Day, or ever, then I strongly suggest you follow my above advice and join me in my quest to acquire as many cats as humanly possible.However, if you are looking for love, good luck.  And for the love of all things that are good and holy in this world, never ever listen to anything I ever tell you to do. ****************************** For more amazing love advice, follow Mia on Twitter @miasminirants. twoday magazine needs to feel the love this Valentine's Day so don't forget to "like" our Facebook page and follow us on Twitter @twodaymag. In Love, The Single Life, homepage carousel, section landing page carousels 2012-02-03T13:39:17+00:00 Live http://www.twodaymag.com/live/the-hollywood-outsider-banned-objects#When:13:31:11Z This is twodaymag's weekly look at the real issues of the day: celebrity gossip and goings on written by a guy who thinks "Hannah" is an actual town in Montana. The Outsider apologizes for his absence last week, he came down with a sudden and life threatening case of the Day Job.This week the nation prepares itself for the biggest football game of the year featuring two teams whose fan bases both have obnoxious accents, and the celebrity world prepares for its annual night of telling itself how great it is (commonly known as the Oscars). With all that going on, how about we go over into the corner and discuss some headlines? Nicki Minaj Music Video Banned From BET Singer, songwriter and possible robot-from-the-future-sent-to-destroy-us-all, Nicki Minaj, released a music video for her new song "Stupid Hoe" which has since been banned from the always wholesome BET network for being “too raunchy.”Now the Outsider has never heard the song, or even really knew who Nicki Minaj was until about 15 minutes ago, so he's not really qualified to comment... But he's going to anyway.According to TMZ's report, the song contains the lyrics "stupid hoe" repeatedly and has many shots of scantily clad women in it, leading BET to ban the objectionable video.Truthfully, it sounds a lot like a commercial idea the Outsider had for a lawn and garden store called "Stupid Hose" which had multiple shots of scantily clad women struggling with winding up and storing garden hoses. Ultimately, the idea was shot down due to unfair singling out of one item. The Outsider knew he should have added "Shovel off" somewhere in the mix.In all seriousness, the objectification of women by men has been going on in the rap and pop community forever. Minaj should be outraged. Is BET saying that she can't objectify women just because she's a woman?  The rap and pop community needs to be fair, it shouldn't matter what race, religion or gender you are; the right to objectify women should be granted to one and all equally. Right? NJ Town Bans Snooki Citing Quality Of Life Issues The Mayor of Hoboken, NJ apparently has decided his state has taken enough crap from everybody for The Jersey Shore, and so he has denied a permit that would allow a new MTV reality show spinoff in the works staring Snooki and J-Woww to film in Hoboken.For those who don’t know, a “Snooki” is a cross between a snuggie and a cookie, so it’s practical, keeps you warm, and if you’re a diabetic, it will wreak havoc on your blood sugar. One would assume a J-Woww is a type of excitable person. Hard to say really.Regardless, the NJ Mayor has denied the filming permit citing “protecting public safety and quality of life concerns for Hoboken residents.”This was a bold and prudent move on the part of the mayor. As much fun as reality show publicity is, Snooki has proven to be a Tasmanian Devil of chaos, leaving in her wake a path of destruction and Valtrex that scientists say could take years to recover from.If the Outsider was to offer any advice it would be to move the show to a place that not only tolerates, but welcomes such stupidity. The first choice is obviously Chicago, but St. Louis takes a close second. Donald Trump Accepts Imaginary Presidential Cabinet Position Here’s one more fun piece of news for everybody. Should Presidential Candidate Mitt Romney win the Republican Nomination and go on to win the Presidency, and offer Donald Trump a cabinet position, the Donald would accept it.Should this happen, it could be the most entertaining cabinet appointment since JFK made Marilyn Monroe undersecretary of the interior (BOOM!).5 years ago the Outsider might have found the proposition of a reality TV host negotiating with China on our nation’s behalf somewhat concerning, but now given the state of things, he is starting to fee like everybody else: “Whatever, it’s not like he could make it any worse.” ************************* twoday magazine wants to know: Who needs banned most of all: Nicki, Snooki, or the Donald? Share your thoughts on our Facebook page. Celebrity Relationships, The Hollywood Outsider, homepage carousel, section landing page carousels 2012-02-03T13:31:11+00:00 Blog http://www.twodaymag.com/blog/its-your-health-radio-interview-outsourcing-your-marriage-proposal#When:12:20:07Z CLICK HERE for the interview.Don’t forget to check out other fabulous and informative interviews with the very talented and lovely, Lisa Davis, on It’s Your Health Radio. In the News, Love, Site News 2012-02-02T12:20:07+00:00 Live http://www.twodaymag.com/live/the-self-improvement-project#When:12:09:16Z When teaching me how to play golf, my father never gave me more than two things to work on in my swing. Most of the time he would spend an entire afternoon focusing on just one part of my game, helping me perfect it until I was ready to move on to something else. He didn’t want to confuse me or fill my head with too many thoughts.This style of teaching has always proved to be the most effective for me.I was on the range recently, working on my swing. Not hitting it solidly, I would try a new thought to change up my swing for every shot. Whether it was my grip, ball position, or how I took the club back, I wanted a quick fix. Before I knew it, I had twenty thoughts in my head and started swinging like I had never touched a club before. Then it occurred to me that I was working on too many things at once. When I started reining it back in and sticking to a singular purpose, I slowly began hitting the ball better.What if the same principal can be applied to other parts of our lives? I know for me, I try to fit in way too many self-improvements at once: exercise more, eat better, be nicer to people, don’t cuss so much, stop procrastinating, become a better listener, and the list goes on and on. What if, instead, I took two things or maybe just one thing at a time, and focused on improving those aspects of my life before moving to another set of issues? In the book, The Happiness Project, author Gretchen Rubin creates a twelve-step plan for herself to become a happier person. She picks one new thing to work on every month, making it less stressful on herself. Whether it was being kinder to others, not nagging her husband so much, getting rid of clutter in the house, or trying to make more friends, Rubin details the struggles of taking on even just one of the tasks. While she certainly faced obstacles, in the end she concluded that she became a happier person because she learned to focus on one thing at a time, rather than lumping everything in at once.How hard could it be to start my own happiness/self-improvement project? Certainly I didn’t have to do exactly as Ms. Gretchen did, and I could create my own set of rules. Each month could be dedicated to a part of myself that could use more a little more TLC. And if I didn’t feel that I had improved at the end of the month, I could stick with the same thing until I felt a shift in the right direction. There doesn’t need to be a timetable for how quickly we change. Golf is like this in life as well; for a swing change to become permanent, it sometimes takes months to undo the habit of swinging the club the wrong way.This is where patience with ourselves comes in. Whenever I get impatient with myself on the golf course, it shows. I start making more mistakes, then I become quicker to judge myself for my failures. One bad hole turns into several bad holes, and I put more pressure on myself to start playing better. I can tell you that it never works. Never.This is true to life. The more pressure we put on ourselves to get to a place we want to be, the harder it is to be kind and patient with our shortcomings. Of course we want things to better right away. Unfortunately, in most cases, life doesn’t work that way. Commitment to change isn’t saying, “I gave it everything I had these last two weeks and nothing is different!” Commitment means staying on the path towards self-improvement even if you have hiccups along the way. Of course, it’s easier said than done. I’ve given up on myself plenty of times; however, I don’t believe I was committed to real change during those periods. Sure, I wanted to be better, but I threw in the towel when it became too hard. Just like with golf, if I don’t commit to a swing change, I will never get better. It’s really quite simple.In golf, you can only hit one shot at a time. Life is pretty similar in that regard. I’m still learning to enjoy this journey, but it seems a lot less stressful now that I’m taking on just one part of myself to change at a time.***********************************Follow Anya on Twitter and keep up with her experiment with the Self Improvement Project @anyaalvareztwoday magazine wants to know: Are you going to commit to positive change this year? Share with us your goals on our Facebook page. Health and Wellness, twodaymag's Relationship Contributor: Anya Alvarez, Sex and Self Awareness, homepage carousel, section landing page carousels 2012-02-02T12:09:16+00:00 Live http://www.twodaymag.com/live/the-south-beach-diet#When:12:22:22Z There's something about names and titles of things that grab our attention and that is the first enticement of The South Beach Diet. South Beach? Woo-hoo! Sexy bodies on the sand, crowded dance floors at hot night spots filled with beautiful people, heat, sunshine, upscale and fabulous lifestyle. So, yes, I admit it, I love Miami, love South Beach, and wanted to try the diet with the hot name.Surprise! Except for having the same name, the diet has nothing to do with South Beach itself. It is a healthy diet. The best thing is that it is a diet that is easy to maintain for life. This diet junkie has finally found a food lifestyle that I can live with easily.Through my nutritionist, Michelle, I learned about 'south-beaching' and why it was the best way for me to not only lose the 22 pounds I wanted to lose, but keep it off. I was never, ever hungry on South Beach while losing weight and in addition to that I learned about my body and what it really needs to function well. A little background on the South Beach Diet is necessary. It was created by Dr. Arthur Agatston, an established cardiologist. In the mid-1990s, in response to his disillusionment with the low-fat, high-carbohydrate diet that the American Heart Association recommended, Dr. Agatston believed that the low-fat regimens being prescribed were simply not working long-term. He had patients with heart problems and diabetes who were obese and needed a diet they could stick with over the long haul. Their blood chemistries needed to be stabilized, and the up and down dieting track was not helping them. Keeping hunger at bay was a must to avoid having his patients, whose quality of life and, in some cases very lives, depended on losing weight, go off the diet wagon.Besides encouraging healthy meals of protein, salads, vegetables, and low carb fruits, Dr. Agatston promotes strategic snacking. You're not doing it right if you don't snack. There's no counting calories or strict portion sizes, but there's no gorging, either. The idea is to eat normal snack portions. The problem is that too many of us don’t know what a “normal” portion is! (My husband thinks a normal snack is 2 doughnuts!) Be that as it may, once you are able to determine what a normal portion is, snacking becomes easier. A piece of low carb fruit, a handful of nuts, a piece of low-fat cheese; you’re snacking healthily!The diet comes in 3 phases. It’s a comfortable, gradual way to begin a lifestyle program. Call it a learning process about what your body needs to maintain optimum health.On Phase 1, you’re allowed lean protein sources (eggs and egg whites, seafood, remove skin from poultry, lean cuts of beef and pork, soy foods), fat free and low fat dairy products, one serving beans, low starch vegetables, small amount of nuts (you have to count them), olive oil, low carb condiments and beverages. Nothing else, including fruits and alcohol.Phase 1 was the hardest and I did insist on having cream in my coffee. Coffee without cream would have been a deal breaker on this diet for me. As I liked everything about it except for not being able to have cream in my coffee, I made that one adjustment. I did miss fruit but I rationalized it was only for 2 weeks. After the 2 weeks I had lost 12 pounds and food tasted differently to me. I felt healthier, too. Phase 2 is a little trickier because, in the first two weeks on South Beach, you eat from a prescribed list of foods, and that’s it. After the first phase, it’s time to start individualizing the diet for your own body and tastes. The idea now is to gradually reintroduce some high nutrient, high fiber, low glycemic carbohydrate into your diet. How much and what types will vary between individuals. I added back two fruit servings a day. It is very important to pay attention to your own body’s reactions to adding the carbs. I did and found out what foods made me feel sluggish and what made me feel energetic.South Beach also offers a plan for vegetarians which I am currently following. (There is one for vegans, too.) The food that you can have on the South Beach Diet will also depend on how strict of a vegetarian you are. Eggs and low-fat milk can be consumed through all phases of the diet. You can also substitute these items with soy milk or egg substitutes, like Egg Beaters. On the vegetarian and vegan plans you are encouraged to choose vegetables and legumes high in protein, beans, chickpeas, split peas, broccoli, squash, tomatoes, low fat cheese, tofu, soy nuts, veggie burger without the bun, meatless chicken nuggets, eggplant, cucumbers, pine nuts, walnuts and cashews. Some new foods for vegetarians have recently been added during phases 1 and 2 and they include apples, apricots, beets, carrots, corn, oatmeal, wild wheat and brown rice.Again as with the other diets I have written about during the last two weeks, the Calorie Restriction Diet and Weight Watchers, no one diet is a fit for everyone so here are the pros and cons of the South Beach Diet. The Pros: You won't go hungry on The South Beach Diet. Protein satisfies the body and staves off hunger longer than carbs. I learned that not all carbs are created equal; an apple has carbs and sugars but is infinitely better for you than a piece of apple pie! I’ve been south-beaching for over 4 years and do not get hungry. I eat more than many people I know and I’ve been able to keep the weight off. Weight loss is faster. I lost 12 pounds after 2 weeks and felt healthier. During phase 2 you will lose about 2 to 2 ½ pounds a week. Eating out. You have to love a diet that allows you to eat out with friends. Granted alcohol, desserts, and fruit are not permitted the first 2 weeks, but a normal meal of salad with olive oil, lean meat or fish protein, and vegetables, is a plus. No more eating a dry salad while everyone else is having a normal meal. Exercise is encouraged. Because the diet was originally created for people who were ill and unable to do strenuous exercise, walking and light weights were recommended. I did ballet barre and Pilates during the first phase and went on to playing tennis during the second phase. Nutrition. I like a diet which emphasizes variety, nutrition, and whole foods while deleting processed foods. Energy. My energy did go up and that dragged out exhausted feeling after working long days diminished. Snacking in a healthy way may have had something to do with it. Cons: Very Restrictive First Phase, which could turn some people off to the diet. "Carb crash" can occur, depending upon the individual dieter's food selections. Not Enough Structure for some people when it comes to adding carbs back in. This diet leaves a lot up to the individual, which is good in the long run, but is probably harder in the short run. It is not individualized. There are no differences in the diet for men versus women. False expectations. After a weight loss of 10 – 14 pounds  the first 2 weeks, some people may have unrealistic expectations. Weight loss in the next couple stages is considerably slower. Would I recommend this lifestyle diet? Yes, to anyone who wants to lose some initial weight fast and yes to anyone who likes meals that you can tailor to your needs. I would also recommend it to those who are willing to find out how certain foods affect their bodies and yes to those who find most diets leave them feeling hungry.I wouldn't recommend South Beach to any person who is a carb lover; that's like waiting for disaster. If you like bread, pasta, and rice dishes and would feel deprived without them, this is not for you. As for me, this is my lifestyle eating plan. I feel healthy, am active, and am not hungry. Whatever works, and works well, is the best diet for you.******************************© 2012 Kristen Houghton all rights reservedNeed some laughter in your life? Read Kristen Houghton's new e-book: 

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 And Then I'll Be Happy! Stop Sabotaging Your Happiness and Put Your Own Life First twoday magazine wants to know: Have you tried the South Beach Diet? What was your reaction? Share your thoughts on our Facebook page. twodaymag's Lifestyle Contributor: Kristen Houghton, Health and Wellness, homepage carousel, section landing page carousels 2012-02-01T12:22:22+00:00 Blog http://www.twodaymag.com/blog/its-your-health-radio-interview-is-marriage-sacred-anymore#When:12:22:01Z CLICK HERE for the link to the interview.And don’t forget to check out other fantastic interviews on It’s Your Health Radio!****************************Follow Lisa on Twitter @healthmediagal1Follow Natalie on Twitter @nataliestweets In the News, Love, Site News 2012-02-01T12:22:01+00:00