Two Day Magazine

The More You Know About Your Body...The Better Your Sex Life Will Be!

We all have those questions that we should ask our doctors about, but sometimes feel embarrassed or uncertain and don’t want to speak up. Well, here are the answers to some of the more common and pressing sexual health questions. The more you know, the more empowered you will become and the better sex you will have! Now, if that’s not a reason to keep reading, I don’t know what is!

Dear Dr. Buffman,

I suffer from vaginal dryness during sex: What can we do to increase lubrication or suggested fixes?

Vaginal dryness can occur in any age of sexual maturity and the reasons can range from emotional to physical.  The following conditions represent the most common causes of dryness:

• Insufficient arousal through abbreviated or lack of foreplay.
• Decline in levels of estrogen production which lead to thinning of the vaginal wall and loss of muscle tone – this leads to the need for more arousal time common in perimenopause.
• Dyspareunia, also known as painful intercourse, can cause pelvic problems or local vaginal issues.
• Physical causes can include, diabetes, chronic pain, childbirth, breast feeding, allergy, use of cold medications (antihistamines) and Sjogren’s syndrome, which is a chronic systemic inflammatory disorder characterized by dryness of all mucosal tissues.
• Emotional issues, including depression, anxiety, and most commonly good ‘ol stress which limits relaxation; an important component to increasing blood flow via normal stimulation.

Remedies for vaginal dryness include:

• Proper hydration – at least 8 to 16 ounces of water per day.
• Check the chemicals in your environment –specifically personal, bathing and laundry products can contain perfume products that can irritate vaginal tissues.
• Following a low fat and high carb diet starves the body of important nutrients necessary to make sex hormones – add soy and flax seed to your diet to help amp-up estrogen and phytoestrogens, which affect the production of sex hormones.
• Vaginal lubricants and Vitamin E suppositories can help replace natural moisture when it is lacking.
• Lastly, don’t forget good communication with your partner to express your needs, what turns you on and off.

Dear Dr. Buffman,

Does it really happen to every guy? ED, that is.

During any age of male sexual maturity, a man can experience some degree of erectile dysfunction. Early on in life, a lack of experience, performance anxiety and depression can all be factors in erectile dysfunction. Later in life, hormonal deficiencies, diabetes, chronic pain, allergy medications, smoking, fatigue, pelvic trauma, cardiovascular (circulatory) compromise, certain hypertension medications, cancer surgeries and chemotherapy can affect sexual function.

However, there is relief for anyone who looks for it. First, find out the cause and seek the advice of a sexual expert, don’t just reach for the “wonder pills.”  Have a baseline of blood work performed, and, if necessary, have the nerves and blood flow to the genital area surveyed.  Self-education through internet resources or the library can provide many quick resources for men seeking improvement in their sexual function. Relationship issues, specifically poor communication, sexual pressures to perform and peer pressures, are also common factors. Often times, a change in diet to more plant-based foods can alleviate symptoms of ED, as well.

Dear Dr. Buffman,

Be honest, is the G-spot real or not?

The G-spot, or Grafenberg spot, after the German gynecologist, Ernst Grafenberg, describes a bean-shaped area of vaginal tissue that some women assert contains an erogenous zone which when stimulated sufficiently, can produce high levels of sexual arousal and very powerful orgasms. Anatomically it is located about one to three inches up the front of the vaginal wall between the urethra and the opening of the vagina. In spite of many years of sexual research, investigators cannot agree as to the presence or absence of such a specific spot. Even amongst women, studies cannot agree as to the presence of such a site and its subjectivity.

Different from the clitoris, stimulation and orgasmic response of the G-spot requires constant firm pressure and motion via manual stimulation, intercourse, or both simultaneously. Other studies suggest that this area is also related to the female ejaculation, which comes from the Skene’s glands, the female version of the prostate gland, that excretes non-urinary fluid during orgasm. In this urethral tissue there is also a spongy, erectile tissue that is filled with extra sensitive nerve endings.

Most importantly, however, is not the presence or absence of the “G Spot” that determines adequate sexual response, it is the self-education and self-explorations of what feels best, so that a woman can communicate this to her lover.  Neither women nor men come with instruction manuals on how to please them, so you need to speak up as to what your likes and dislikes are and enjoy the journey of exploration!

Dear Dr. Buffman,

I always ‘finish’ before my girlfriend. How can I make sure she’s getting as much pleasure as I am?

Finishing, coming, and ejaculating, are all the same words for both the male and female climax.

The average time that a man ejaculates following penetration is between three and seven minutes.  This is obviously variable and depends on many factors.  My definition of “premature ejaculation” is not a specific period of minutes after penetration, but instead any length of time during intercourse that is too short to please both partners. One woman may need two minutes to reach multiple orgasms, and another may require over thirty minutes to reach one.

First and foremost, a man, after the first few years of sexual maturity, should seek medical evaluation from a sexual expert, to ensure that he does not have physical causes of premature ejaculation. These physical factors are frequently associated with overly sensitive penile nerves and occasional irritation or infection of the male urinary tract. Some types of erectile dysfunction, specifically losing erection strength in the middle of intercourse, can lead to early ejaculation. Severe anxiety can also contribute to this process.

How do you know if your partner is equally satisfied? Why not ASK HER?  Communication in and out of the sheets can produce the sensitive but integral information that a man and woman need.  Once again, men and women are not mind readers. Sex is comprised of more than just intercourse.  Foreplay is individual for many and the “cookbook approach” doesn’t always work for all females or males to respond. After intercourse, if there is a sense of insufficient fulfillment, “after play” with direct stimulation manually or orally, or sometimes with toys can produce the final results.

What’s the take-home information for men? Educate and explore resources from experts in the field of sexual medicine. Communicate with your mate.  There are many treatments and technical advice that can greatly improve your capacity as a lover.

A little about Dr. Barry Buffman:

Dr. Barry Buffman is a Board Certified urologist who joined the Los Angeles Boston Medical Group in 2002 as the physician of the Los Angeles office.  He graduated from Arizona State University with a B.S. in Psychology, and later completed his medical degree at Rush Medical College in Chicago.  During his early academic career, Dr. Buffman studied the early markers of prostate cancer and compared their effectiveness as early screening tools.

After completing his surgical residency at St. Vincent’s Hospital in New York, he went on to complete a residency in urology at Columbia Presbyterian Hospital. In the course of his career, Dr. Buffman has enjoyed over 20 years of private surgical practice in sub-specialties in sexual dysfunction, oncology, laser and trauma.