Two Day Magazine

Sometimes, things sound better in theory...

We’ve all been there. We heard something either online, on television or on the radio, and thought, “Ooh, I am definitely going to try that and spice up my sex life. That sounds hot.”

Then, you do try it and realize how ridiculous/silly/embarrassing the idea really was and wish you could take it back. Sure, it makes for a fun story to tell your friends over drinks a few weeks later, but in the moment? Not so much fun.

Never fear, however. Twodaymag has compiled the top 5 worst sex blunders to avoid so you don’t have to be caught with your pants down, er, so to speak.

Blunder: Making a Sex Tape

Come on, people. With all of the celebrity sex tapes out there, all of the embarrassing and (often times) hilarious footage of watching the rich and famous get it on, you would think the rest of us would know better than to record our steamy sessions between the sheets.

How to Avoid: We all believe in happily ever after, but it doesn’t always end up that way, and your personal footage could end up all over the internet, Facebook, or sent to your friends via email by your naughty ex. Avoid this embarrassment by either not making a sex tape at all, or keeping the only copy you do make and destroying it if the relationship comes to a bitter end.

Blunder: Sex in the Shower

Sounds like fun, right? Sure, it’s all fun and games until someone slips. Now, I’m not trying to be a downer, but sex in the shower is a lot more fun in theory, or watching it in the movies. In reality, it is hard to stay “wet” in the shower, for the water washes away any natural lubricant and twisting your bodies while avoiding water up your nose or in your eyes can be a real mood killer.

How to Avoid: Foreplay in the shower, however, is a lot more entertaining, less dangerous and can lead to fun outside the slippery confines of your tub. Oral sex is easier to maneuver since one person is usually standing, while the other kneels. Washing each other’s hair, teasing each other...these are all fun, sexy ways to heat up before you hit the bedroom. However, if you do insist on getting dirty while wet, I recommend a silicone-based lubricant to keep things moving. And, a no-slip shower mat is a must!

Blunder: Sex in Public

Now, I am not the fun-police trying to ruin your Tuesday night. I get it, I understand the thrill of wanting to be in the open but not getting caught. It’s totally sexy and exciting in theory, but you have to be careful you are aware of the risk you run in case you get caught. Having “sex offender” on your record isn’t exactly a turn on.

How to Avoid: If you really want to indulge in outdoor sex (and who doesn’t now that the weather is lovely?) I recommend a location that is remote enough that people aren’t milling around constantly, but close enough to your car that you can make for a quick getaway. Wearing a skirt that you can hike up minimizes the stress of worrying where your clothes have gone should you have to make for a quick getaway. Nighttime is always a better option, as well, for the odds of being seen decrease, but you still get that excitement. If you have a fenced-in yard....well, that’s a major plus!

Blunder: Sexting Nude Photos

Oh, this is one most of us are guilty of. We need not look further than our sleazy politicians and starlets to know that this is a sex blunder that can come to bite you in the ass later on. But, what do you do when your partner isn’t around and you want to show them that you miss them and want to sex up your texts?

How to Avoid: If you must send a sexy photo, try to avoid sending one with your face in the photo. That way, if you do break up and your ex decides to be nasty and forward the photo, you can always deny it. You never know who your partner may show the photo to when and if you break up, so make sure you take at least a flattering photo. That way, if it does ever leak and everyone knows it was you, at least you looked good!

Blunder: Hook Up You Found on Craigslist

Sometimes, when people want to do something that is out of their “sexual norm”, the idea of finding anonymous sex seems like a good idea. No one has to know, no one will gossip about it, and you can just file it under “hot, kinky sex”. Not so fast.

How to Avoid: Hooking up with anyone you meet online can be a tricky situation. You want to make sure that person is safe, you don’t want to put yourself in any danger, and you don’t want to end up in a situation that proves to be less than favorable.

So, take necessary precautions when meeting someone you met online. Meet somewhere public. Have your own mode of transportation to and from the location. Let a friend know that you are going on a “blind date”. I don’t recommend sleeping with anyone the first time you meet after meeting online, because you don’t know this person well enough to know if they are a sexual predator. This especially holds true for women.

Sex is fun, of course, but it isn’t worth being hurt over. Be careful who you let into your life...and your bed.

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Catch up with Natalie on twitter at @nataliestweets or email her your questions/comments at .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)