Two Day Magazine

The Pros and Cons of Finding Love Online

Dating is difficult. Going to bars and clubs can lead to one night stands, but how many long lasting relationships really arise out of it? Randomly meeting someone at the grocery store or at the gym is always a viable option, but do you really want to bank on that as your source for dating? So, then, you think, one night as you stare at your computer screen in your pajamas, alone, clutching a carton of ice cream, ‘why not internet dating?’ Well, I hear you! Let’s discuss.

The Pros:

Internet dating is plentiful. There are seemingly endless sites dedicated to the very notion of meeting “The One’. Whether you are straight, gay or anything in between, you have options! A few of the popular choices are: match.com, chemistry.com, eharmony.com, prescription4love.com and gay.com. No matter who you are, there is a site to fit your needs!

Internet dating is easy. You just sit down at your computer, answer questions about yourself (who doesn’t love to do that?) and fill out information on what you are looking for. You can be as specific or as general as you want to be, you can add photos to your profile to increase your chances of finding someone, and you can weed out the ones you aren’t interested in, while contacting the ones you want to get to know better.

Internet dating is cheap. You don’t have to break the bank to look for love online. Most sites charge you by the month, or you can buy a three month, six month, one year package. For example, match.com is very reasonable, at $24.95 a month, while eharmony is a little pricier at $59.95 per month.

Internet dating is fun. It’s fun to go through people’s profiles and possibly be on the verge of finding “The One.” It’s fun to get emails from people that are interested in you, set up dates, and go out with potential lovers. Who doesn’t enjoy the thrill of the hunt? It’s good for the ego, if anything!

Internet dating works. Many people find love online. Around 40 million people in the US are looking for love online. With that many people out there looking for the same thing that you are, true love, you are bound to meet someone who shares your passions, interests, and values.

The Cons:

Too many options. It’s easy to throw people out for not looking a certain way, saying the right things in their profile, or not living in a geographically desirable location. Because we have so many options, we are constantly looking for the bigger, better deal instead of working on a relationship that is right in front of us. Because of all these choices, we become spoiled, unreasonable in our demands, and quick to judge one another.

It’s too easy. Anyone can put up a profile. Even if they are already dating someone else, or worse, even if they are already married. Because of the anonymity of internet dating, it is easy to fall into the “hook-up” traps of dating services. Unless you have a clear goal in mind of wanting to be in a relationship, it is easy to get sidetracked by all of the other “wishy-washy, just looking, kind of interested in relationships”, profiles on these dating websites.

Internet dating is time consuming. A close friend of mine recently set up an online account with match.com. She is a very pretty woman, so you can imagine the amount of emails she received the first day alone! Who has time to weed through all of those emails and try to find a viable date? It’s like a needle in a haystack! She has since been on two or three different dates with different men, but nothing gelled. So, my question is, is it worth the hassle?

Dating someone you met online can be dangerous. Now, I am not talking about “To Catch a Predator” dangerous, but seriously. You don’t know the person. They don’t know you. Even if they turn out to be a totally normal, nice individual, what if the date is horrible? What if the date is boring? What if the date shows up in a mustard colored suit or something? There is something to be said for knowing what they really look like, what they really act like, and if there is actual chemistry before committing to a date. So, when planning that first date, just meet for a drink or coffee, and find your own way there and back. Keep it casual and short, just in case you have to bolt!

Internet dating doesn’t work for everyone. Some people are shy. Some people believe in having privacy and don’t necessarily want their whole life story up online, complete with pictures, for everyone to see. So, what do those people do that don’t feel comfortable? What if you just don’t have the energy? Going out on dates can be emotionally and physically exhausting after a while, and since you have to screen everyone, yourself, you could end up on dates that are, frankly, a waste of time.

Just remember, internet dating is a great way to meet people that you would never have the opportunity to meet in your daily life. So many of us have so little time for our love lives, and it is easy to get sidetracked and ignore that important component of our existence. Take a chance, you never know who you might meet! Just remember, though, that the internet isn’t your only option in your quest for finding lasting love!

Tomorrow, I will present a different option instead of online dating. I had the pleasure of interviewing Amy Laurent, the founder and President of Amy & Laurent International, who is, in fact, a matchmaker. Let’s see what she has to say on the business of meeting “The One”!