Two Day Magazine

I was reading through the typical online gossip sites, and I noticed any chance these sites had to photograph Shiloh Jolie-Pitt, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt’s biological daughter, they have to comment on the fact that she likes dressing and acting “like a little boy”.

Angelina recently told Vanity Fair, “Shiloh is like a little dude. Shiloh, we feel, has Montenegro style. It’s how people dress there. She likes track suits, she likes suits. She likes to dress like a boy. She wants to be a boy. So, we had to cut her hair. She likes to wear boys’ everything. She thinks she’s one of the brothers.”

I can’t imagine how strange it would be to grow up and have photos taken of you almost every day and scrutinized since you were born. It doesn’t help that your mom is so open about what you like to wear and how you want to do your hair.

However, since the Brangelina brood has put a spotlight on this topic, it does present itself as a way to discuss how we all feel about gender differentiation and how important people feel it is for us to adhere to specific gender roles. As I perused an article today on People.com about Shiloh’s desire to “dress like her old man”, I couldn’t help but scroll to see what the comments were from other people about her “tomboy chic” style. Here’s what some had to say:

“I hated wearing ‘girl’s clothes’ when I was a kid, and my parents allowed me to dress and act as I choose. I see nothing wrong with this.”

“Another bad choice, Ms. Jolie-Pitt. Children need guidance in making choices.”

“It scares me that some of you have a problem with the way Angelina and Brad are raising their children. If a child is expressing him or herself through clothing or style, what’s the problem?...What people should care about is that she is happy, healthy and loved. Which she obviously is.”

“...does she also ask to have a boy’s haircut??? And also the interviews where they’ve shared that she wants to be called John. What have they done to this kid???”

After reading many of the comments, I became frustrated with people’s reaction. What is exactly the issue with Shiloh wanting to emulate her older brothers and feeling more comfortable wearing boys’ clothing and having a short hairstyle? When I was a little girl, I used to play outside, hated wearing bows and dresses (just ask my mother) and loved playing with my brother and the other boys in my neighborhood, pretending to be super heroes and playing with GI Joe. I never looked at specific activities or clothing as being “feminine” or “masculine” and my parents never made an issue out of wanting to play soccer or take dance classes.

The idea of insisting on creating gender-specific activities for boys and girls to be involved with is absurd and it hasn’t done our culture any good. It ostracizes children and adolescents that feel that they don’t fit into these molds, and it creates unrealistic and unhealthy expectations in our society. Not all little girls like to play with dolls and easy-bake ovens. Not all little boys want to play with guns and action figures. We have got to start recognizing and nurturing both aspects of our humanity. The feminine and masculine live within us both, and by trying to section off and prevent either side from being expressed can be damaging both psychologically and physically. In the end, isn’t it best that our children feel free to express their ever-evolving nature and to embrace and love who they are? Think of the beautiful world we would create if everyone felt comfortable in their own skin!