Two Day Magazine

Dear Natalie,

My best friend and I have known each other for twelve years and he and I have been through everything together. We have helped each other through family issues, break ups with our boyfriends and girlfriends, school stresses....everything. And recently, I have started to develop real feelings for him. People are always asking why we haven’t hooked up with each other...like there is something they are seeing that we don’t. Well, I am starting to understand what they mean. He recently broke up with his girlfriend and I haven’t dated any guys in a while. The timing seems right. And the other night, we were watching a movie together when I fell asleep on him, only to wake up to him stroking my hair. Is this a sign? Do you think he likes me? I’m terrified that we could end up ruining our friendship, or worse, that I’ll tell him that I love him and he won’t feel the same. Any tips to navigate through this?

--Fallen and I Can’t Get Up

Dear Natalie,

My girlfriend is seriously addicted to her cell phone. She sleeps with it. She is constantly on it. We go out to dinner and she sits and texts her friends instead of having a conversation with the person sitting across the table from her. She can’t go anywhere without it. She claims it is because of her job, but she even brings it in the bathroom with her when she is taking a shower. I can’t take it anymore. Yesterday, I hid her phone and she freaked out at me so bad, I think we are on the verge of a break up. Can you please give me some tips on how to salvage this situation? I love her, I just hate her phone.

--iMad

Dear Natalie,

My wife and I have hit a rough patch in our marriage after 7 years together. I moved out recently and have been staying in an apartment for the last two months. We are still seeing each other and sleeping together and have no plans to divorce, but she and I both think that a break is needed. Well, I recently met a woman that I really hit it off with and we’ve begun a sexual relationship. She knows I’m married and she isn’t looking for anything serious. The question is, should I tell my wife? We never talked about whether or not we were going to see anyone else, just that we needed some space. We are supposed to meet with our therapist on Friday and discuss when I should move back in. Should I keep this to myself?

--In Limbo

Dear Natalie,

My older sister came out to my parents last year and it was quite a situation. They didn’t speak to her for almost six months after the fact, and even now things are very tense. She’s 22 and I’m 18. Well, I have recently come out to my sister, knowing that she knows what it is like. Being a gay guy growing up in Missouri hasn’t been easy, but at least having my sister’s support has helped me through it. She said she knew I was gay for years, but didn’t want to push me to say anything I wasn’t ready to. I asked her if she thinks I should tell mom and dad. She said NO. After how they treated her, she is scared they will act the same, or worse, with me. The other problem is that my mom is always saying to me, “Well, at least we have one normal kid.” My dad and her make jokes about my sister’s sexuality, and I don’t say anything, even though it really hurts me to hear them making fun of her. It seems as though they hate her for what she did to them. What do I do? I still live at home and don’t want to make my life hell until I can start college and move out. Should I just keep quiet until then?

---Trapped in the Closet

Dear Natalie,

Where are all the good women? I am a 26 year old guy, I have a great job and lots of good friends. But dating sucks. Seriously. I want a relationship and all that seem to be around me are flighty women who can’t commit. I thought women WANTED to be in relationships? The last girl I went out with just graduated college and I thought we had a great time. She never called me back after our date, but she will occasionally text me and flirt with me. What is up with that? Can someone please explain the rules because clearly I assumed women liked dating.

--No Good Women

Dear Natalie,

I recently lost my father to a chronic illness he had been suffering with for many years. While he and my mother had a tempestuous relationship at times, they always seemed very much in love and were married for almost thirty years. Well, my mom has already started dating again, and it hasn’t even been a year since my dad’s death. When I told her that I thought it was kind of ridiculous that she would jump back into the dating pool so soon, she got really angry with me and said that I should mind my own business. Well, let’s just say that was two weeks ago and we haven’t spoken since. Where do we go from here?

---Strained Loyalty

Dear Natalie,

My boyfriend confessed to me tonight that he likes to dress in women’s clothing every now and then. He says it turns him on and it feels nice against his skin. He said he isn’t gay or anything and didn’t tell me because he is really embarrassed by it. The reason I found out was that I stumbled upon a pair of pantyhose and thought he was cheating. He let me see his collection of women’s lingerie and such. I’m totally weirded out, though. Is this normal? Is he gay and just in the closet? We’ve been together for three years and our sex life has always been HOT...how did he keep this a secret?

--PantyNOse

Dear Natalie,

My best friend and her boyfriend have been together for years. Everyone assumes they will get married, and she talks about it a lot. All of us are very close and he and I often hang out when she can’t. She is completely aware of that and gave him the “ok” a long time ago. Plus, I would never betray her trust. However, last weekend he got really drunk and told me that he wants to be with me. Things aren’t working out with her, apparently, and he wants me. I was totally shocked and didn’t know what to do. Now I have no idea how to act around him because the whole thing has me feeling so uncomfortable. I’m worried he is going to say something to her or that he expects something from me. What do I do? Plus she is my friend and I am really sad for her that he is acting like this. Any advice?

---Caught in the Middle

Dear Natalie,

I just started dating someone a few weeks ago. Should I be expected to get her a Valentine’s Day gift? I don’t want to freak her out.

--Mike

Dear Natalie,

This is sort of an embarrassing question, but I need to ask someone about it. I’m dating this guy and we get along great. The sex is great....but his penis is on the small side. It really doesn’t bother me, but he gets incredibly self conscious about it. What can I do or say to make him feel more secure in bed?

--Just Fine With Me

Dear Natalie,

My girlfriend literally creates drama all day long. I will be at work (she doesn’t work and we live together) and get these crazy texts about how I am cheating on her (which I am NOT) and how she found another girl’s number in my cell...which of course, always turns out to be someone she knows and then she feels dumb. She freaks out over nothing. I can’t continue dealing with this immature behavior. My last girlfriend was like this, too. Is it me?

--Chicks Are Crazy

Dear Natalie,

My son is seven years old and has become very close with a little girl in his class. I have had her over for play dates, but I had only met her father, who seemed like a very nice man. When I asked to meet my son’s friend’s mother, however, the man chuckled a little uncomfortably and stated that his “life partner” was a man. They have been together for seventeen years. He wants to invite my husband and I over for dinner this weekend and I am incredibly uncomfortable with this. My husband doens’t see what the big deal is but  I don’t want my son hanging around gay men. I certainly don’t want to have dinner with them. How do I politely say no?

---Keep It To Yourself

Dear Natalie,

My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for about six months now and we are starting to feel the pressure. It has started to create some tension between the two of us. We both really want a baby and I am worried that it isn’t going to happen. We actually got into a huge fight yesterday because he suggested we “stop trying for a while and just have some fun again.” What does that even mean??? Totally confused. Any thoughts?

---Oh Baby

Dear Natalie,

Valentine’s Day is approaching and all of my friends seem to have boyfriends. I feel like a loser and completely alone. I’m 22 years old and I have only had one boyfriend and he dumped me. Is there something wrong with me? I have a lot of friends, I just got accepted to law school, and I enjoy painting as a hobby. Is there something wrong with me? Something I should be doing? I feel really frustrated that my love life is non-existent. Any tips for how to land a man?

---Single and Hating It